poems+journey of life=complete me!!!

gonna::hit::a::try

i live for yesterday,
i live for today,
i live for tomorrow...
and tomorrow's coming too soon...
never let me breathe...
too cruel to even let me breathe...
too cruel to let me in...
too cruel to let me go...
yet im stuck in between...
in or go???

shaken inside,
the fact that i have to face the truth...
haunted by nightmares...
burden with unaccomplished dreams...
the pride that needs to hold...
im about to lose control...

and if tomorrow never come...
will i ever get the chance...
to live for yesterday...
and im sure it's just way too impossible...
no matter what...
face the journey ahead...
and you will find...
the path u created...
is about to visible...
in front of u...

i hate the fact that i have to survive...
to be strong...
to let go...
to step forward...
and never look back...
live for another day...
and just...
let bygone be bygone...

coz when it's time,
then i'll be proudly saying this...
"i had give it a try"
so this time around...
all i need to do is...
gonna::hit::a::try =)

again, as i looked through my blog, i realized that im always writing something about the journey i've been through in my life...yet, as im getting older, im getting wiser with all the experiences that i've gone through...looking back, i noticed that some of the poems that i wrote are related to my hard life either as an architecture student or in love, studies, friendships and so on...and this poem was written during my "recovering time" (that is when i failed my studio, and i didnt have the courage to move on, i cried all day, got no one to share my feelings, i mean like sharing it personally, so i kept it to myself and started to write poems and its been a while since i last wrote one)...to be frank, most of the poems that i wrote, i dont have any intention to share it with anyone and i kept it in a book or write it on a piece of paper, then it will go missing...and studio always give me nightmares...im scared if i can do it, if i can pass it...all these thoughts been teasing my feelings, sometimes i cant cope with it, that i just need the air to breathe...even after all these while, i still not have the confidence yet so all i hope is that, im going to gain my confidence for this coming new semester which starts aroung july 2008...till then...daaaa!!!

xoxo,
pray for me,
rauda

p/s : this was taken from my other blog which im going to terminate it since i no longer wished to waste my time by having two blogs...

The not so "shadowy" journey

ok, so i've just finished watching "shadow in the palace"...a korean movie that hits the cinema recently...thought of watching it at the cinema, but eventually, someone cant make it, so it ended up me downloading the movie and watched it by myself at home sweet home....tadaaaa!!!!

supposed, this story should be interesting with all the murder to unveil, but somehow, the director didnt play with it very well...it was like in the end, you didnt knw whats going on, and i was like, sooo confused...hahaha...luckily, i didnt watch it at the cinema (kalo x, burn duit i seyhhh!!!)...by the way, the end result was a lot of wasted potential. instead of 113minutes, it should be extended, since there's a lot to tell...if i've to give points out of 10, then i shall give it 4...hahahha...

thought of uploading the video trailer here, but cant find one...instead, i have this music video that u may like...hahahah...at least if you dont like it, just pretend to like it lahhhh... :p...and ohhh!!!do you need me to describe why??ofcoz its becoz of wu chun, and he looks sooooo adorable with that smile and yet he's sooooo HOT!!!(owh panasnye smpai buat aku berpeluh-peluh...hehehe)

ok thats all for now, i need to clean the house before going to UM today, to meet Datin Sri Nila (yeah,ofcoz discussing on the trip to kedah) and grab some breakfast...im hungry, real hungry sbb x makan since yesterday...i only ate an apple =( with my ibu not around, seems like my eating schedules are disordered...miss my ibu's cooking...someone plsss....i need a home-cooking dish...waaaaaaaaaaa!!!(dah muak makan kedai jeee)...ok ok!!i need to stop before its getting too long here...hehehe...till then, daaaaaaa!!!muah muah






xoxo,
rauda

p/s : i miss my ibu and ayah!!! and forgot to put the lyric so that u can sing along with it...hehehhe

a journey to "the past"

hey hey there...so yesterday we went to jazzy's house in malacca...and we managed to find her house without "sesat"ing...HAHA...and yes, jaz was really busy carrying her briefcase and standing next to her dad to fulfill her duty as the deputy minister of finance...smpai dua beg ko tukar kan?mule2 ungu and then gold...waaahhhhhhhhhh!!!mesti byk duit dpt...hehehehe...pulang laa modal sket kan... :p

anyway, we did manage to take some pictures with u jaz!!!

rite after the kenduri, we headed to dataran pahlawan and jonker street...actually the main reason is for shopping, but i dunno, didnt feel like one there...but the shops there are quite ok...the guys as usual being the guys, went for bowling...duhhh...come on laa guys...kat memane pon korg bleh bowling kan???hahahah...and so atiq, being atiq, followed the guys becoz she cant stand us for always shopping...hahahah...nk wat camner atiq...ni laahhh lumrah pomsss!!!!tp cmner pon, kitorg tetap ade dua org bodyguard lelaki yang teman kitorg sepanjang berjalan ke jonker street...yelahhh...dunia skrg dh x selamat...so ni laa bodyguard kitorg (kimie + izwan pilus alif aziz)...a tribute to them...heheheh

we walked down that street and took really nice pics (heheheh...everyone with their own slr)...some of the shophouses maintained and some were not...its pity that we cant take photos inside the shophouses...semua org penat, but yeah, we had fun...even though on the way balik, jam starting kat seremban-PD exit (so we used the jalan lama and stopped by at mantin for solat and beranang for dinner!!)...ok...thats all for now..daaaa

xoxo,
rauda *_^

p/s : guys...byk sgt gambar candid laa...kalo nk personally msg me...

the journey stopped by at the "BLAST STATION"!!!

again today, as im writing this blog, im having my sleepless nite...so i just spend some time here, to burn the oil...heeeeeeee....well, first of all...i would like to say THANK YOU or in other words, XIE XIE NIE, KAMSA MIDA, ARIGATO, SYUKRAN (well i knw only these words...hahaha!!!) to the very first person yang bagi comment kat blog i yang x seberape ini...someone, play that drum roll thingy, and give it up for NURHAYATI NORDIN a.k.a YATISAKURA!!!!im honored to know that there's someone out there reading my stuffs here...heheheh!!!muah222....

ok, so yesterday went out not as planned, i would rather say, it turned out to be 50-50 successful....heheheh...well, i didnt go to the "pasar" since my sister slept rite after she ironed her husband's cloth, and i was like, browsing the net, reading the online news (utusan.com.my + harakahdaily.net =u can conclude the who's telling the truth out there!!!), checked my mail, checked my friendster (hahahah!!!thats a must ok!!) just to keep myself from asleep rite after subuh...yelaaa...dah kate pon nk kene g pasar kol 7 kan...and macam x kenal saye, saye kalo tido mmg serius akan bgn lambat!!!and the best part is, i was struggling myself not to fall asleep, but then my sister bleh laa tido...ingatkan die wat ape laa kat dalam bilik die tuh ngn suami die...rupenye tido...gile tertekan seyhh...hahahahah...so after penat waiting, around 9am tuh, i started to feel sleepy, so i went straight to my bed (which happens not to be a bed ok!!!FYI, i was kicked out from my own room since my sister get married, so now, im roomless!!!waaaa...x caye, tnye mursyidah...betol x???heheheh :p ) to sleep...baru je nak terlelap, my sis kuar bilik n ajak g pasar...i cakp...

"ceh!!!aku baru nk tido, aku ketuk bilik ko, ko senyap je...hampeh laa...xpayah laa g pasar, tp kejut aku kol 10.30, aku nk tengok gak movie tuh..."

"ok..."

masing-masing terbaring and senyap...ntah ape die pikir time tuh, then she said...

"weh, ape kate kite g je warehouse sale tuh pagi nih...kalo pas lunch ramai gile seyhh...aku malas laa nk berebut2 ngn pompan2 kat sane tuh nnti..."

"alaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!ko nih, suke kaco aku tido laaaa....."

"aku tau, ko kalo skali tido, sure takkan bgn nye!!!" (well thats true, becoz i havent sleep yet since last nite which is becoz my sleeping hour dah lari)

"eeee...ko nih...xleh langsung tgk aku senang laa...yelaa22222...g laa mandi cepat...aku kene bgtau mushy sbb aku dh ckp nk g lepas tghari cmtuh..." (so i told mushy the change of plan, n she was ok with that...)

CONCLUSION NYE!!!I X DAPAT TGK THAT SHADOW IN THE PALACE THINGY....waaaaaa *sob sob*

but its ok, atleast im happy, i mean very much happy...heheheh...becoz ive got to shop like heaven...we went to that guardian warehouse sale (n buy makeups at a very cheap price...hey hey, real cheap ok!!!), went to jalan kenanga somewhere around jalan hang tuah (sha bg direction, dgn semua pon xtau jalan, and i yang ingat2 lupe mane jalan hang tuah nih, main redah je...at last sampai gak...heheheh...bought a cardigan and a pair of shoes...tp kan, aku kene tukar kasut tu balik, sbb die bagi salah saiz...sebelah 39 sebelah lg 38...hahahahahah!!!!), then next, we went to zara warehouse sale at corus hotel (bought 2 pasang baju at 40bucks!!!dh x larat nk korek2 baju lain dah sebab me and mushy dh sakit tengkok...hahahahha) and rite after that, we hit the theater at taman budaya, yang kite agak sesat laa jugak untuk smpai ke situ....heheheh...

but overall, i had a blast yesterday, and my sis is complaining yg die sakit2 kaki macam sakit mase die merentas desa dolu22...ehh, come on laa sera....as if u r not used to it...duhhhhhh!!!! :p

and ingat kan nk smbung lagi g ke guess warehouse sale kat bangsar village today, but my anak buah was around and so, i korbankan peluang itu demi saeed tercintaaa...heheheh...so we just went for a dinner at uncle chili's with the whole family plus uncle man and tok yang but minus my ibu and ayah =(...miss my time with u guys around...plss...come back home early...

ok ok ok....so tomorrow...we all are heading down south to jaz's house...and jonker road!!!wait till we come ok coz we are going to take photos and shopping like tomorrow never come...when i said we, that includes (famiza, aainaa, sha, mushy, yati, atiq...yasmin zal n kakros ade dihati kami wpun xdpt g...heheheh)...so esok kawan2ku...jgn lupe kumpul kat UM kol 9, then kite konvoi ok!!!!yeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa....

till then...i need to rest, push myself to sleep, so that i wont be sleepy tomorrow as its going to be a very long day...let me end this with a nice poem(walaupun x nice, anggap je nice...hahahaha) by me...it has a very deep meaning, so its up to u guys to interprate the meaning in your own understanding...

to be cool, is to keep low...
dont be fool, and do not show...
all the worries, just let the wind blow...
all the pains, take the chance to hold...
feel it, so then only...
you hold the future...
in the eyes...
in the eyes of the enemies...


n owh!!!lupe nk bagi tau...kire nye...i xtido2 from the nite b4 until kol 2.30 am the next day...well, its not impossible kan for an architecture student...rite friendssss???/




xoxo,
rauda ^_^

starting my won't last forever journey

hey YOU!!!thanx for stopping by at this blog...weeee...i know this blog is new...and theres nothing much yet...but spare me some time to upgrade it...

well, i used to have a blog using my friendster account, but i was sooo busy back then, that i didnt update it for quite a long time...so, it ends up that, hey why not i start a new blog, where it can be the new-whole-me??uhuh!!!and yes, so here i am...writing this blog...i dunno...maybe i was like, missing my old school memories, where i used to write all those "karangan" for my exams...hahaha...being a student in a not-so-best (forgive my term, x ikut tatabahase ok!!) university in malaysia, makes me nothing but a lazy butt person...hahaha...here, i dont write "karangan" for god sake, but we do write thesis, report and what not...yeah, and its tough though...with all the assignments to do, and as an Architecture student, with all those sleepless nite, i cant even have time for myself...ok!!i wont talk about my boring life as a student here...but, i will share with u guys the very fun part of me...hahahah...i dunno if i AM that fun ok!!!i'll treat this blog as a place for me to blurt everything for everyone to know the not-so-privacy-part-of-me even if i dont know u (now i do sound desperate for letting people know about me!!!but hell with that...heheheh :p) ...forgive my rudeness when im writing, but trust me, i dont swear...

i dont know how to describe the main point or what's the concept of this blog, but let me just put it this way, its just some stuff or daily things that i used to do...like shopping, hot news, or even the current Malaysia politics issues...hahahah...im not a politician, but im following their steps...people like Dr Mahathir and Dr Khir Toyo are now writing their own blog even though they're those very busy person, so why not me right???i've got nothing else to do this 2months holiday, besides sleeping late n waking up real late (i MEAN it, REAL late!!!), shopping, watching movies, being a not-so-research-assistant for Pn Sri Datin Nila, eating at Bazli(it's a new restaurant at the very front of my house, and makanan die sedap gilerrr seyhhh!!!not joking at all) and anything...just tell me what...and again, tonite im having my sleepless nite, since i only sleep during the day...somebody help me to fix my time...arghhhh...

ok...so tomorrow, will be a very busy day for a not-so-busy person like me...hehehe...well i planned, but i dunno if its going to happen as planned...

7.00am go to pasar...buy all the barang dapur...its been a long time since my parents not around....

12.10pm im going to watch a movie with my sister..."shadow in the palace". i heard that its a very interesting story...read it somewhere in the local newspaper...plus, its a horror movie...

around 3.00pm im going to P.J for Guardian warehouse sale...see, i told u...im a shopping freak...hahahaha...

at 8.00pm im going out with my friends to watch a local theater at Laman Budaya...i enjoyed watching theater, and been once acting in it...hahahah...

well, maybe that's all for tomorrow...since the day after tomorrow which is the 4th of May, we (the whole 3rd year archi students) are going to Malacca for Jaziah nye sis n abg kawen...laaaa...ingt kan Jaz yg kawen...hahahahah...but that will be next time probably...hmmmm....(starting to imagine what if my friend gets married) :p

so, i guess i'll continue later sometimes...or else, i wont stop...hahahhaa...till then...

xoxo,
rauda